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  #1  
Old 01-26-2017, 07:08 PM
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Is this messed up?

Before I confront my wife with it I'm asking you guys which I know is a mistake. It's the end of the month and to prove a point I have kept track of naughty time. It's 3 times with sex and 2 blowjobs in one month. I don't feel like that is even remotely enough for a happy sex life in marriage. I know with life and other stuff things happen but keep in mind I've been laid off almost all of January.
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Old 01-26-2017, 09:01 PM
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Talk to her brother. I have been there many times. Usually a conversation will kick things in gear for a little bit.
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Old 01-26-2017, 09:19 PM
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I might talk with her about it, but there's no way I would let her know I was keeping track of it. That's guaranteed to seriously piss her off. You'll never hear the end of it...
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Old 01-26-2017, 09:35 PM
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that is a month? That sounds like a normal Saturday to me.

If I were you, I'd tell her what your needs are and not be manipulated. If she refuses to meet your needs, then I guess you'll get to make a decision.
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Old 01-26-2017, 09:42 PM
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Been there bro, when life gets super busy and small kids are being a handful my wife spreads the loving a little thin. Me keeping track actually helped in my situation because as we all know time flies and she honestly (at least that's what she told me) didn't realize how few and far between the intimate encounters were getting. I only kept track after we had several "discussions" about the frequency and our numbers were way off. Lol
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Old 01-26-2017, 10:48 PM
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It gets better as the kids grow. She's got her business, your keeping odd hours with out of town work...5 times with all that going on... and let's face it, it is with you afterall...lol
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Old 01-27-2017, 12:12 AM
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I wouldn't talk to her. I'd take her out on a date. A real date. Sex is about putting your woman in the right frame of mind. A little extra effort on your end usually produces extra effort on their end. If you're going to talk then during the dinner at a nice restaurant say, "Look I realize I've dropped the ball on my end for romance and letting you know how incredibly beautiful you are and how much you turn me on. And I'm going to do a better job of letting you know that I really do feel this way, because I'd like to get back to the sex life we used to have. I'm only telling you this because I didn't want you thinking I was having a mid life crisis or losing my mind when you see the outfit I bought you for later tonight."

Last edited by Tbar; 01-27-2017 at 12:15 AM.
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Old 01-27-2017, 03:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tbar View Post
I wouldn't talk to her. I'd take her out on a date. A real date. Sex is about putting your woman in the right frame of mind. A little extra effort on your end usually produces extra effort on their end. If you're going to talk then during the dinner at a nice restaurant say, "Look I realize I've dropped the ball on my end for romance and letting you know how incredibly beautiful you are and how much you turn me on. And I'm going to do a better job of letting you know that I really do feel this way, because I'd like to get back to the sex life we used to have. I'm only telling you this because I didn't want you thinking I was having a mid life crisis or losing my mind when you see the outfit I bought you for later tonight."
This. Don't point your finger at her. It takes a lot of work from both of you to make it work. Do your part. It takes time, patient. If this doesn't go well. Try again. Do things you never done,or rarely do. Clean the house, cook lunch or dinner, dishes, laundry, etc...be the man. This has to be consistent. Another word, if date doesn't work out, don't express it. You're ok with it. Go to the next step and the next step. If you get pissed off one tiny bit or show any sort of frustration you're basically back to square one. May takes a lot of tongue biting but remember, you be the MAN about it. Good luck brother. Hope it works out...
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Old 01-27-2017, 07:00 AM
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How often do you initiate sex?

If I need a little sumptin' I'm initiating and if there isn't a good reason to get out of bed wifey is in, sometimes even if there is something planned, the poor pup has missed a few morning walks, and she is in the mood it is on. We are intimate on average 5 times a week, she gets 'serviced' and then it's my turn, sometimes it's only me that gets it. I have zero complaints.
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Old 01-27-2017, 10:22 AM
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ok confront is the wrong word and attitude about it. earlier advice is great. try to create an atmosphere where she is wanting to have more sex. if that is not working the process is a frank discussion of your needs vs a confrontation. the fact that she has given you blow jobs says she cares about your needs and wants. so that is a starting point. let her know what your needs are and work together on how to get those needs satisfied in a mutually acceptable way. if she is needing things outside the bedroom that is a good place to start. if she comes home and the house is clean and dinner is cooked then what excuse does she have to say she is too tired??? any way the confront for more sex will never work as well as the "i want to have more sex with you beautiful"
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